31 January 2013
As an onlooking guest at the wedding of an elderly gentleman and his perky young fiance, my prevailing thought was that his funeral would very soon follow the honeymoon and also that no-one at all could blame him for making hay while the sun still shone.
Among the menfolk present there was an air of lustful envy at a man so advanced in years romantically coming to grips with such a fresh young thing, the inherent risk of heart failure being mentioned more than once in discreetly hushed tones...accompanied by a knowing look, of course.
The groom himself wore an expectant smile as he gazed upon his frisky little bride-to-be perfectly happy to face the supposedly hazardous prospect ahead and obviously champing at the bit to get cracking.
Perhaps his swansong would last a month or more and perhaps the wedding night would see him off but whichever was the case he fully intended to enjoy every second remaining to him for he had long held the view that pretty young women were wasted on foolish young men.
If her enthusiastic lovemaking might actually finish him off then so be it, he was keen to go out with all guns blazing and besides, he could honestly imagine no finer nor more thrilling way to end his days than riding off into the sunset in truly glorious style.